Hot town, summer in the city …
You know the score. It’s the dog days of summer, the anticipation of June long since melted in the gridlock of every beach and the mercury spending way too much time in triple-digit land the more east you live. So grab the sticks and head up to what’s known as the Central Coast, where the back of your neck will feel cool and breezy.
Alisal Guest Ranch & Resort – River Course, Solvang
Background: “Sideways,” that irritatingly charming movie about Central Coast wine country, had golf scenes. Remember? Those were here. The deep track runs back to the padres and the rancho dates from after the Mexicans sent the Spaniards packing, which was right about when the Americans came in. The place is going on 60 years now as a guest ranch.
Golf: You have to work to go yard at Alisal, despite the dry water feature in the name. The best bit of advice is to watch yardages on the numerous short par-4s and hold back accordingly. And, oh yeah, a knockdown shot in the afternoon is handy.
Best hole: If you’ve seen photos of the course you’ve likely seen the island-ish, wedge-length 17th. Nine is the one-swinger, though, a short-mid iron hole downhill over an arroyo cast in shouldering trees and a swirling, nose-diving wind.
Extra credit: Welcome to Denmark in the Oaks; get your kitsch on. Eataebelskivers – donut-shaped apple pancakes; buy a T shirt with a windmill on it; take home Ingeborg’s chocolates; grab a gift from the Wandering Dog Wine Bar.
La Purisima Golf Course, Lompoc
Background: Built by Scottish immigrants for the Spanish king, La Purisima was rediscovered in the 1980s when a NASA survey party went looking for an errant missile launched from Vandenberg Air Force Base. OK, maybe not. Credit goes to Robert Muir Graves, who worked magic across 300-plus acres of oak woodland.
Golf: Constant movement, few flat lies, heaving greens, only a whisper of wind coming in from the Pacific not far away – wink, wink. You earn your chops at La Purisima. It’s also flat-out gorgeous and one of the underrated plays in California.
Best hole: Too many, so let’s go with 14, a short, 90-degrees-to-the-port par-4. Every time I aim over the trees. Most times I wish I hadn’t. And the layup is difficult, too, with going left involving oaks and right bringing a thicket of a hazard in play.
Extra credit: See how the frontier operated at nearby Purisima Mission State Park and toast the handiwork of some of the best modern vintners in the land at the Lompoc Wine Ghetto and Trail.
Olivas Links Golf Course, Ventura
Background: It’s California, so, as often is the case, “development” started with a 19th-century rancho. In the mid-20th, a golf course appeared on part of the land, and not long after Mother Nature washed away one-third of it. The city muddled on for many years with an aging 18 until … it’s all better now.
Golf: The course is links-y in feel. (Please don’t write in; it’s not a links course. We get it.) Here it’s on purpose, not the function of nature, with a total redo that embraced natural contours, sinuous margins and bordering native grasses, plus the removal of hundreds of palms. Keep to the centerlines and you’ll be fine.
Best hole: Olivas gets into your soul quickly, and it takes only a few swings to realize the place is grounded and organic for being so new and manufactured. The par-4s stand out, so let’s go with the double-dog sixth, which plays north of 400 yards into the wind.
Extra credit: Get to town early for a round-sustaining fill up at Pete’s Breakfast House. You should walk Olivas anyway, so the carbs and calories will do you good. Note that the house proudly extols the virtues of its homemade beans and – extolled more proudly – that they’re not vegetarian beans. This ain’t Hollywood; order extra bacon, too.
Sandpiper Golf Course, Goleta
Background: Once an oil field and refinery that was shelled by the Japanese navy, the only crude or hazardous activity along this Pacific headland these days is being paired with me. The inland holes’ stock in trade is sharp cornering, with 10-14 all about the ocean backdrop.
Golf: If you don’t qualify for the local rate, this place is princely priced. Then again, it’s less than Torrey and you could buy a new putter with what it saves you over Trump, yet that’s the same ocean and this routing makes sense.
Best hole: Ten is dastardly if the hole is set on the small plateau at cliff’s edge, 11 cascades down to the beach and 12 claws back up. Still, give me 13, the nastiest par-4-length par-5 around, with a canyon cutting across the line of play and a green that appears to be floating.
Extra credit: Head next door and go all gypsies in the palace at Bacara Resort & Spa. Drinks are a deal compared to room rates, and be sure to self-park so you can walk the lot ogling the cars that cost about what your parents spent to send your brother to USC (while you went off to North Platte State College).
